Carpe Jugulum

Mightily Oats has not picked a good time to be priest.

He thought he’d come to the mountain kingdom of Lancre for a simple little religious ceremony. Now he’s caught up in a war between vampires and witches, and he’s not sure there is a right side.

There’s the witches — young Agnes who is really in two minds about everything, Magrat, who is trying to combine witchcraft and nappies, Nanny Ogg who is far too knowing … and Granny Weatherwax, who is big trouble.

And the vampires are intelligent — not easily got rid of with a garlic enema or going to the window, grasping the curtains and saying ‘I don’t know about you, but isn’t it a bit stuffy in here?’ They’ve got style and fancy waistcoats. They’re out of the casket and want a bite of the future.

Mightily Oats knows he has a prayer, but he wishes he had an axe.

Annotations collected and edited by Leo Breebaart.